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Why can't I achieve my goal? What prevents it and how to fix it?


How often do we set ourselves goals, write a big and precise plan to achieve them (as described in many smart books), and begin our journey through the thorns to the stars? And do we reach them? Well, if at least half, usually even less (I know by myself).


What did I do when my plans didn't work out?


I thought at first that I was doing very little. In the end, he started to work 10-12 hours a day so that at least a step closer to his goals, but alas. Although something happened, but because of the schedule I missed the moment when the collapse of my marriage (not so sure the result I expected to get, but it ran).


how do you achieve your goals?


Then I began to think that maybe I was giving up early and just don't give up. But there were more and more difficulties, which led to emotional exhaustion, and the reward was never in sight.


Read more: how to be a master - How to become the master of your life?


Then I started to think that I just started late and the time has already passed, and the tools for implementing goals are already outdated and do not work. But in parallel, there were a lot of examples that all this works. People in the same field and at the same time reach very high peaks.
etc., etc...

In short, the reasons were dark, but they did not help to understand the issue and resolve my situation. And if you think about it, what was stopping me?

First mistake: no doubt, HYPER-inflated importance. I wanted to get my goal at all costs and it went to my own detriment. After all, fanaticism is not welcome in anything. It's like if you have to sit still, for example, at the dentist. If you start thinking about it constantly, then almost always there is an irresistible desire to scratch somewhere (I hope not I am the only one who does this).

how do you achieve your goals?

I paid no attention to the obstacles that appeared in front of me and stubbornly walked along the lined way, stuffing a lot of cones. After all, I believed that the route that I had determined for myself was the only correct and best one.


But how did I get that idea, because maybe it wasn't the walls in my path at all, but just turns on a shorter road to the goal. But to see this, you would have to at least look at the whole situation more broadly, and not standing a centimeter from the wall.

The second mistake: as soon as I got even a little closer to what I had planned, I would tighten my grip as much as possible, trying to control literally everything. This is very typical for us skinners (terminology from vector psychology, more details in the following articles). I did not allow even the slightest opportunity for life to bring my goal any closer.

It's like fishing with your hands in muddy water. You do not see the fish (your target), but after feeling it with your hands, you need to gently, almost gently take it with your hand and smoothly get it out of the water. If you try to grab it sharply or squeeze it hard with your hand, then 95% of it will break out, and you will be left with nothing.

how do you achieve your goals?

What is the result?

What do I mean by all this, if you have defined a goal for yourself and it is really Yours! Then on the way to it, be as aware as possible, do not become a fanatic in its achievement and do not try to control everything to the smallest detail, because life can provide us with any benefits almost lightning fast. It remains only to be ready to accept all this.

Go for it! You will succeed, I have found out;

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